I’ve found myself avoiding this post, since it’s my 500th, figuring I needed to say something pithy and wise, an extremely tough assignment since I usually muse about my Dearly Beloved husband, our poop-eating pooch, and the damnsquirrels ruining my flower beds.
Eventually, it came to me that if you’ve been here reading about poop, you probably aren’t expecting pith.
Last week I went to the mountains with my e-mail pals while my Dearly Beloved and Miss Piggy hung out at the beach. North Carolina offers both. Here’s my Saturday photo:
DB decided that while it was just the two of them, he would attempt an intervention with Miss Piggy about her poop-munching. His plan was to spray her deposits with something vile enough to deter her from having any interest in excrement–rabbit, dog, or otherwise.
Before you ask, yes, we do take her on walks at least twice a day, our pockets full of plastic newspaper bags to use as pooper scoopers. I’m talking about the additional deposits she leaves when she goes in the back yard. This cocker spaniel poops at least three times a day, usually more, and scatters it in the grass, so collecting it isn’t as easy as it sounds, especially if it’s a predawn or evening deposit.
We think she poops more than she eats. She may be a record setter, but we’re not looking for a trophy, believe me.
DB threatened to use Clorox, but not wanting to kill either her or the grass and not being able to find the Clorox, he chose Windex instead. I can picture him cruising around the back yard with his spray bottle, spraying Windex on all the little Tootsie Roll turds.
It was all for naught. Here’s his e-mail to me, reporting the results of his Windex experiment:
Doesn’t work. Her teeth are sparkling.
How did I digress this far? Back to my 500th post…
You’d think I’d have found my stride by now about my writing, but my most widely read post had only 14 words in it and they weren’t even necessary, so I certainly can’t get any direction from that. It was one I did a year ago: Why I Love Caller ID.
Bloggers often do Giveaways and get lots of blog attention on anniversary days. I considered that, but what in the world would I offer? One of my half-finished knitting projects? Squirrel recipes? If I’m going to have a Giveaway, it’s not blog attention I’m after anyway, but an opportunity to give one of you something special… because you’re special to me. Here’s what I decided:
Go to BroJoe’s World and select your three favorite photos. Leave a comment giving me a general idea–butterfly, sunrise, a dragonfly, etc. If you win, we’ll get specific later to make sure I order the right prints. Right now, I’m simply curious to see which ones are favorites. You can also tell me which size you’d prefer–5×7, 8×10?
BroJoe says all of this is okay with him.
We’ll make the deadline October 28. I’ll put all the entries in a jack-o-lantern and get DB to draw one. (Hah! You probably thought I was going to scatter them in the yard and let Miss Piggy choose, didn’t you?!)
If you want to include any suggestions for Dearly Beloved as to what he might try in his spray bottle next time, feel free to add that, too. Not something to put IN her food–we’ve gone that route– but something he can spray on it. Won’t get you any sway in the drawing, but it’ll give Dr. Strangelove something to ponder. . .
Help take a load off his mind.