Rebellious ear syndrome is not something I’ve ever read about, but I’m pretty sure I have it.
Last week when I was getting ready for the beach wedding, I had a problem putting a simple gold earring on my left ear. The earring post would go in okay, but it wouldn’t come out the back. I tried other earrings. No problem. I tried both earrings in the right ear. No problem. I labored for about 20 minutes and finally went to the ceremony with naked earlobes.
Admittedly, I don’t wear earrings often. Sweat pants don’t call for them. Still, if other earrings (or earbobs, as Dearly Beloved insists on calling them) go through, the opening hasn’t grown over. Tell it to the ear.
Yesterday, since it was just the two of us, DB and I went out on the town for Thanksgiving dinner. “Out on the town” meant a delightful meal in a beautiful restaurant on the 24th floor of an uptown building. It also meant eating at 11 AM to get DB back home in front of the TV for all the football. Sleeping through TV sports is one of his favorite holiday traditions.
I pulled out the earrings again–my favorites because they’re pretty, lightweight, and comfortable. I put on the right earring; no sweat. The left one? Nothing doing. I took out the right earring and tried it in the left ear. Nope. Wouldn’t go there.
I put another earring in my left ear and tried to get the post of the gold one to follow the path. Nothing doing. I put a heavy one on and pulled it around to enlarge the hole. (Don’t mess with me!) Didn’t help.
In frustration, I put the earring in as far as it would go and found DB reading the paper. “Look at the hole in the back of my ear lobe and guide this earring through it,” I asked.
You’d have thought I’d asked him to lance a boil or sew my fingers together.
“Sheeenga hongggga. . . Gaaahhhhhhh. . . urp. . . aaaahhhhhh! I can’t do this!” he told me after a full 15 seconds of trying.
I went back to the mirror to try again, but my left ear was the color of a raw turkey neck. I tossed the earrings back in the jewelry box and went naked again.
We had forgotten that all the streets were blocked off for what’s said to be the fourth largest Christmas parade in the country. Not just one street, but blocks and blocks, and the cross streets as well. Just like with the earring, we were at a loss as to how to thread our way to the other side.
With all the fog, it looked like the high rise view wasn’t going to matter. This is “uptown” Charlotte. It used to be “downtown” Charlotte until the city bigwigs decreed it otherwise. Their thread of logic is that it sits on a rise, therefore “downtown” is incorrect. “Uptown” doesn’t seem all that correct either. Uptown needs department stores and they’ve all moved to the malls. There are plenty of bank buildings, however.
Was it a good idea to have him wandering around during Thanksgiving dinner? It’s not like having Santa Claus visit during Christmas dinner. He looked grouchy, perhaps because he wasn’t going to Disneyland. Then again, are there any eye openings for the stuffee inside? Oh well, he couldn’t see my turkey neck earlobe.
Someone had to lead him around. Sounds like a job for the birds.
The elegant buffet was set up in two different rooms and I rose to the challenge of trying it all. DB was much choosier. He ate mostly salmon. Maybe the ear surgery had grossed him more than I realized. Or perhaps the sullen turkey psyched him out.
One seat in the entire place that gave a view of the Carolina Panthers’ practice field–his. They practiced while we ate.
This was my view. I was intrigued with the tiny little cemetery across from the big church.
I don’t know the name of the second building from the right. I call it the Mad Hatter building. It is shaped like his hat. This is not a very illustrative view. I’ll do better another time–when there is no parade.
The building pictured below is the Bank of America building. Hugh McColl was CEO when it was erected, so Locals call this the Taj McColl.
When the bank first began here, it was called North Carolina National Bank. We didn’t fault them for getting bigger britches, but we hope the headquarters remain here.
On street level, the trees were lighted festively. The viewing stands and TV trucks were still blocking the streets, but the parade had ended.
Close your eyes, white light purists, there are some bodacious lights out there ! Charlotte didn’t have any difficulty putting on HER colorful jewelry!
This picture is an optical illusion. The building actually DOES have a pointy head.
No doubt some turkeys were hanging around this corner, too.
We had to ride the elevator again to get to our car. I’m not sure why, but these pipes intrigued me.
Back in our neighborhood, things weren’t as festive. This is located on a nearby corner. How uncouth!
Hang a wreath on the door, you turkeys!