Aversion Therapy

Dieting has never been one of my success stories.   My will power is nil, my appetite is healthy, and most of my hobbies–reading, knitting, writing, sewing–are done in vegetative position.   I sit a lot;  the tail tells the tale.   (ouch!)

Last week I went out to lunch with a couple of friends.  One ordered a salad, the other one a vegetable wrap.  I ordered a cheeseburger and fries.  My logic was that I love cheeseburgers and fries and it was a special occasion.  WHY was it a special occasion?  Because we were eating out.  

See the problem?

I’ve found that Aversion Therapy works to some degree.  For instance,  one whiff  of hog farm stench keeps me off pork for months at the time.    Find a hair in a particular dish and any time it’s served again, my brain flashes on that hair.  The pecan shell that broke my tooth in a cone of Chunky Monkey ice cream years ago caused me to cross that flavor off my list…but then, it’s a pretty long list.

Too bad that potato farms don’t smell bad.  And bread… does it have to smell so heavenly?  

No more. 

Food?  No thank you.

DB and I went to a diner for lunch and the usual urges kicked in.  Hot damn!  Eating out! I ordered a hot dog.  Now is there anything good in a hot dog besides the taste?    Didn’t matter:  Eating out = special occasion.  Give me something in a bun! 

One bite into my hot dog, I looked past  Dearly Beloved’s  right shoulder at the group sitting on counter stools. 

This is what I saw:

(Careful, now!)

 

 

Crack

The Aversion Therapy of my nightmares. . . . I could  be a Size 2 by Christmas.

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8 thoughts on “Aversion Therapy

  1. HOT DAMN LOL! Do not let the stool sitters yank on that TP holder! What a SHOT! That’s the way to start the morning for sure! Would you like a bit of crack with that steamy hot cinnamon bun? teehee…. omg…. what a shot!! I’m reminded of the time I saw …. (no other way to put it) a whole lot of butt hanging off the sides of a 10 gallon bucket turned upside down being used for a seat. I was amazed at what that bucket could support!

    Now watch…. for having poked fun at chaffed cracks and big bucket butts, I’m bound to get caught with something hanging out of somewhere today!

  2. Tee hee…well I think that is a reason to buy pants that fit at the waist! Yikes…
    that makes me want to drink water only…ok maybe a fry or two..
    or three
    give me some sweat pants that fit at the waist…
    most any body can fit in those without a but crack showing..

  3. I guess you need to smell a potato that gets rotten in your pantry overnight and makes your pantry smell like sewage. I wish aversion therapy would work for me.

  4. Julie

    Did you take that photo?!?! You have great zoom on your camera/phone or you were very close!!!! 😉 Yes, that would ruin my appetite!

    1. merrilymarylee

      Yes, I took it with my trusty little camera which doesn’t have much of a zoom. I pretended I was taking a picture of Spouse and then edited out his right ear and shoulder. I had no idea that I could bring it to its hairy butt glory by enlarging with computer. I knew it was bad, but I didn’t realize it was THAT bad. It’s a picture that doesn’t leave you! I was even in a different room; wouldn’t have the nerve to go up and take a picture of someone’s rear. I cropped out his t-shirt writing just in case somebody thinks that crack looks familiar.

  5. I’m with you. I LOVE hot dogs and cheeseburgers and we never have them at home. When we go out for a “ladies luncheon” I watch the others order their salads, etc., and have no problem ordering a hot dog or cheeseburger with fries.

    I think that guy must travel a lot. I’m sure I saw him here just last week.

  6. I’m cracking up (having to contain laughs – it’s early a.m. which is only making matters funnier.) If I scroll up to look at the crack while reading comments and the “pretending” and grotesque enlargement of the crack once you got it home……. lol…. just one more scroll up before I go ….that IS the picture that doesn’t leave you! I grabbed 2 remaining hotdogs off a grill the other day at the end of a cookout – after I made sure no one was looking .. : -) Have great weekend!

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